Goodbye To You, All The TV

Well here it is. The end of the road for All The TV. It’s been a good run. From (drunk) podcasts to That’s Michigan! to complete insanity, we’ve been through a lot. What started as one girl’s attempt to tell you all why she’s right about TV (and you’re wrong, of course) became a group of people who also wanted to tell you why they were right about TV (and you — still wrong). And those people became pretty good friends, so that’s kind of heartwarming and all that sappy jazz.

Who knows, maybe All The TV will return one day, bigger and better than ever, like a blogging Phoenix. But for now, it’s on to the next chapter for all of us, whatever that may be. The gang will still be on the Interwebs — we’ll just each be doing our own thing for now.

Honestly, I think Michelle Branch said it better on Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

xoxo,

All The TV

P.S. Never forget Nate being wrong about The Killing being something resembling “good.”

Anger Management - 2x12 - “Charlie Gets Lindsay Lohan Into Trouble”

LaToya needed a deserved break from the “hilarious” antics of Charlie Goodson and crew for a week and since TV Land currently isn’t airing any of their sitcoms, I had the room in my schedule to fill in and recap this week’s Anger Management. Sadly, the one episode I get to write about has not a single trace of Kate and her awesome pantsuit game. However, there is Lindsay Lohan, a humping panda wearing antlers, and enough meta jokes to kill someone, so that’s something. Right?

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Anger Management - 2x11 - “Charlie Dates Crazy, Sexy, Angry”

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“An irreverent yet charming sportscaster who, after a loss, finds solace from members of his mandatory group therapy sessions.”

Let’s just acknowledge for a moment that the above is Wikipedia’s episode description for last night’s episode. It’s literally the logline for the show in place of an actual synopsis. (ETA: It’s not even the logline for Anger Management. It’s the logline for Go On, a far superior sitcom and television show, in general. *LAUGHTER*). A person who spends their time editing the Wikipedia page for Anger Management on FX couldn’t be bothered to write an actual synopsis. Much like the writer of this episode of Anger Management couldn’t be bothered to write an actual episode. So I can’t be bothered to write an actual recap.

The episode is simply an excuse for Charlie Sheen’s ex-wife (and now, more humanoid-looking than actually human) Denise Richards to exist (*LAUGHTER*, naturally) and for the “character” of Charlie Goodson to tell her character, with a straight face and no *LAUGHTER*, that unhealthy relationships are BAD and that she needs therapy. WOMP FUCKING WOMP, am I right girlfriend? And as if to say, “We hate you, LaToya,” the episode also featured 1.) the return of Jen walking into Charlie’s kitchen with laundry and 2.) Cryptkeeper Charlie Goodson Banglympics. *LAUGHTER* or whatever. Who cares.

By the way, last night’s episode of Two and Half Men was titled “Bazinga! That’s From a TV Show,” so I realize my life could always be worse.

Next week’s episode is the Lindsay Lohan episode. It’s titled “Charlie Gets Lindsay Lohan in Trouble.” Pray for me, you assholes.

-L

USA Eyes ‘Happy Endings’ Pickup If Cult Comedy Isn’t Renewed By ABC | Deadline

Real talk: I’ve been fairly confident that something like this would happen, based on the fact that not a single one of these actors has booked a pilot when they would all undoubtedly be in high demand and on the market, but it is still VERY comforting to see this in writing.

So, multiple of your AllTheTV-ers have just this season begun watching Army Wives, because why would we not between the cast additions of Melissa Hastings/Meredith Fell, Noel Kahn, and Ashanti. But, to be honest, we are so glad we did because if we had never started Army Wives, I never would have discovered my new favorite thing on TV: Alyssa Diaz’s (aka Jasmine of the too-soon-departed Chloe The Cat Messiah Variety Hour) absolutely ridiculous accent, which sounds like a combination of Brooklyn, Long Island, a touch of Boston, and a heaping dose of oral surgery. Seriously, it’s the best. It’s so good, I have lovingly, phonetically recreated it here, for you all to bask in. Honestly though, the caps don’t even do it justice, you probably just need to start watching Army Wives. Plus, that way you’ll get to enjoy Catherine Bell’s Bangs plan for world domination and super white girls singing Hit ‘Em Up Style and unironic use of record scratch sound effects. Plus, it’s the only way to pay tribute to Claudia Joy, the only woman who could ever tame Bill Brasky.

-N

TVLine, Imma need y’all to fuck off promptly, mkay? Like, the fact that you decided to curtail the positivity of your TV’s most empowered ladies slideshow with some examples of the least empowered is bad enough. But then looking at the ladies you chose? I know the majority opinion of Ashley Davenport is not super positive but girl is workin’ dem schemes and judge her for how she’s done it, but she is right back in as the right hand of the Graysons. Haley Dunphy is such a weird pick, focusing on a one-off episode that wasn’t even Modern Family at it’s mediocrest. I don’t see how anyone can ding the Pretty Little Liars for lacking in empowerment either. But this is the one that I find the most galling. You’re taking a teenage girl (who, let’s not forget is supposed to be somewhere around 14 probably even if Sophie Turner looks older) to task for “not defying her role as human leverage”? Seriously? Sansa has been a lone person in a den of wolves. Even if the wolves are under express orders not to eat her, her survival has been nothing short of walking a tightrope. Not to mention all of the subtle barbs and attacks she has made towards Joffrey and the Lannisters. The girl has fight and brains. If they think that Sansa taking up Baelish’s offer would have led to good things for her, they are just fooling themselves. Look at every single thing that Baelish has done on the entirety of the show. How is that offer trustworthy in any way, shape, or form? The ladies of Game of Thrones are, on a show vs. show basis, the single most empowered group of ladies on TV, Sansa included. She may not be as battle-ready as Brienne or as cutthroat as Cersei or as outspoken as Arya, but to call her an unempowered character is some straight up nonsense. So yeah, as I said earlier, fuck off TVLine. Fuck right off please and thank you. -N
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TVLine, Imma need y’all to fuck off promptly, mkay?

Like, the fact that you decided to curtail the positivity of your TV’s most empowered ladies slideshow with some examples of the least empowered is bad enough. But then looking at the ladies you chose? I know the majority opinion of Ashley Davenport is not super positive but girl is workin’ dem schemes and judge her for how she’s done it, but she is right back in as the right hand of the Graysons. Haley Dunphy is such a weird pick, focusing on a one-off episode that wasn’t even Modern Family at it’s mediocrest. I don’t see how anyone can ding the Pretty Little Liars for lacking in empowerment either.

But this is the one that I find the most galling. You’re taking a teenage girl (who, let’s not forget is supposed to be somewhere around 14 probably even if Sophie Turner looks older) to task for “not defying her role as human leverage”? Seriously? Sansa has been a lone person in a den of wolves. Even if the wolves are under express orders not to eat her, her survival has been nothing short of walking a tightrope. Not to mention all of the subtle barbs and attacks she has made towards Joffrey and the Lannisters. The girl has fight and brains. If they think that Sansa taking up Baelish’s offer would have led to good things for her, they are just fooling themselves. Look at every single thing that Baelish has done on the entirety of the show. How is that offer trustworthy in any way, shape, or form? The ladies of Game of Thrones are, on a show vs. show basis, the single most empowered group of ladies on TV, Sansa included. She may not be as battle-ready as Brienne or as cutthroat as Cersei or as outspoken as Arya, but to call her an unempowered character is some straight up nonsense.

So yeah, as I said earlier, fuck off TVLine. Fuck right off please and thank you.

-N

No apologies for the lost girl orgasm on my blog, but the writers owe us a HUGE apology for this last episode

astoryofrecovery:

Lauren let me hold you

Ok, slight apology to the OP. This is not solely directed at you, your post just happened to be the one I saw that caused me to snap and need to finally rant about this. I’m not trying to attack why you’re upset, you are entitled to your opinion about last episode and while we may disagree, I promise you that THAT is not why this post pissed me off so much.

Rather, it’s about the notion that “the writers owe you a HUGE apology” for this last episode. Too often in fandom, and especially fandom on the hivemind that is tumblr, people get the notion in their head that content is created specifically to be what they desire the show to be, and if the show doesn’t cater to their particular whims, the show is wrong/bad/should be ashamed of itself/needs to apologize. It’s a notion I’ve discussed before in my whole thing about how shipping was ruining fandom, but I feel the need to reiterate again: shows are not built to cater to the fans and they shouldn’t be. There can absolutely be a symbiotic relationship between the two, where fan response influences the direction of the show. See, for example, Emily Bett Rickards in Arrow. Felicity Smoak was introduced as a one episode character, but the fan response to her was so positive (as well as producer response), that she’s going to be a full regular in season 2. There is nothing wrong with that sort of relationship between a show and its fans. BUT, there IS a problem with fans expecting that a show will follow the direction that they want it to.

Beyond just the fact that every fan experiences a show differently and has different characters who they love and hate, thus making it impossible for the show to cater to every fan, fans dictating the direction of a show only ends up, in my opinion, clouding the creative vision. I think Jeff Davis, showrunner of Teen Wolf, is an interesting case here. Jeff Davis is very tapped into his show’s social media presence, and thus, is obviously aware of all of the crazy Sterek shippers out there. So he decided to throw them a bone and include some Sterek moments here and there out of appeasement. Nothing wrong with that (well, that’s debatable I guess, but this is more of that sort of symbiotic stuff). But the problem was, it turned into “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie” syndrome, where the Sterek fans now want more and have turned increasingly upset with the show for not making Sterek canon, even though, beyond throwaway moments and their own delusions (come at me Sterek shippers) there is clearly no basis for a romantic relationship between those two characters. This is a prime example of fans expecting a show to cater to them, and to an extent, Jeff Davis brought it on himself. It’s the same sort of problem that causes so many major studio movies to be shitty nowadays: it’s creativity by committee. Sometimes it works, but too often it ends up muddling the creative vision. And yes, while on TV, there is a certain element of creativity by committee anyways in a writer’s room, there is always someone at the top with the dominant vision for the show. And arguing that, as a fan, your vision is superior to theirs is not just self-important, but it’s only going to result in a watering down of the finished product. Yes, there can be flexibility in that person’s vision that the fans can exert influence on, but it should never be the case where the flexibility overtakes the unique vision.

But it’s not just shows where fans have gotten doses of creator appeasement that they are beginning to expect shows to cater to them. It seems to be the case with any popular element of a show’s fandom, which, not to target them, but often ends up being shippers, that they’ve begun to expect that their narrative, because the most people believe in it, has to become the primary narrative.The Doccubus contingent in the Lost Girl fandom, or Sterek shippers, or the constant ship war that is Stelena vs. Delena on The Vampire Diaries, these powerful factions, because they are the loudest voices in the fandom, seem to think that their opinion of what the show is, simply because they are the loudest voices in the fandom, should be heard and if the show is not hearing them, it needs to apologize for not hearing them because they are the loudest voice and how could they NOT be right? But that isn’t be the case. That’s what fanfiction is for, expressing YOUR particular view of how you would want to see a show play out. But the idea that the writers must cater to fans is incredibly problematic to me, not only as someone who wants to write, but just as someone who loves TV with all of their heart. There’s nothing wrong with headcanons, and being upset with shows for taking story turns that you consider bad, or being upset with shows because you feel like they are leading you on or toying with your emotions (something that I have frequently seen laid out by Doccubus shippers which, while I disagree, I can understand their point of view). But the notion that, because a show makes you upset or you feel like you are being toyed with, that you are owed an apology, is beyond ludicrous to me. Again, sorry to the OP, especially if you meant this in the usual tumblr hyperbolic way, but the idea of writers apologizing for their vision is something I have repeatedly seen on this site and it just grinds my gears to no end. If you’re unhappy with a show, complain about the story, write fanfiction that rectifies it, or just stop watching it, but don’t demand an apology for it, because you don’t deserve one and you’re not gonna get one.

Once Upon a Time - 2x17 - “Welcome to Storybrooke”

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“I hope this episode has a lot of Ethan Embry.” - me, and no one else ever.

Technically, there wasn’t a lot of Ethan Embry in the episode, but that doesn’t change the sarcastic things I say before watching an episode of Once Upon a Time. Now that the pre-episode sarcasm’s out of the way, let’s get to the actual episode.

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Anger Management - 2x09 - “Charlie is an Expert Witness”/2x10 - “Charlie & Catholicism”

The recapper would just like to inform everyone reading this that the recap for episode 2x09 will be in the third person, for no other reason than the fact that this is a recap for the show Anger Management — no one’s paying attention to the goings on of these pieces.

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