Suiting up for the AJ/Daniel Bryan RAW Wedding

“Pro-tip: If you are a pro wrestler, don’t get married during the wrestling show at the wrestling arena.”* 

Tonight (8:00 PM EST, only on USA Network: Characters Welcome!), World Wrestling Entertainment is going to face-fuck you with reminders about how its flagship, Monday Night RAW, is—with this 1000th episode—“the longest-running weekly episodic program in television history.” That’s a lot of qualifiers! We’ve already been told, through helpful “Did You Know?” bumpers that RAW has aired 300 more episodes than Monday Night Football! Totally the same thing! Also, when RAW debuted in 1993, Facebook didn’t exist! That was a good one. They are both on very similar planes of popularity.

But I don’t want to snark too much on WWE for their efforts, because they have decided to shine this week’s spotlight (well, ⅙ of the spotlight, after Brock Lesnar, a D-Generation X reunion, a potential CM Punk vs. John Cena title match, The Rock, and other returning legends) on two of the most entertaining stars in the company: tiny, adorable, stereotypically “crazy” AJ and the best wrestler in the world with the simplest catchphrase in the world (“Yes!”), Daniel Bryan.

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